The Albuquerque Tribune, February 26, 1997 PO Drawer T, Albuquerque, NM 87103 Email: letters@etrib.com Fax: (505) 823-3689 Call: (505) 823-3616 LETTER: Yes to gay marriages The mass same-sex marriage in Santa Fe you reported on Feb. 14 was truly a wonderful event. Anyone who witnessed the love expressed by the couples involved would have to seriously question the motives of those legislators who would attempt to prohibit such unions and even fine ministers who perform them. If they don't approve, they don't have to bring a gift to the reception or throw rice at the couple. There are many churches which perform such ceremonies and many friends and loved ones who celebrate with gay and lesbian couples, but no one is forced to--it's still a free country. All the anti-gay bills in the world aren't going to make gay and lesbian relationships go away. The real issue is why do we have a two-tier system in how gay and straight unions are recognized by the law? Will we continue to deny gay families the legal protections and benefits routinely given to heterosexual couples, or will we treat all people equally? Troy Barber, Albuquerque (tbarber@MEDUSA.UNM.EDU) THE SANTA FE NEW MEXICAN Feb. 13, 1997 Box 2048,Santa Fe,NM,87504 (Fax 505-984-1785, print run 22,278)(E-MAIL: editor@sfnewmexican.com) Roundhouse ceremony is meant as a counterpoint to the anti-gay marriage bill By KEITH EASTHOUSE If Christ preached tolerance and unconditional love, what's wrong with two people of the same sex getting married? Nothing, according to the Rev. Rusty Smith and several other clergy who will be presiding at a mass marriage ceremony of gay and lesbian couples at the Roundhouse today (Feb. 13). The event, expected to attract as many as 100 couples, is intended to send a very simple message to state legislators: Gays and lesbians should have just as much right to get married as heterosexuals. "God created everything and said it was good and that includes me," Smith, who is gay, said Wednesday. Smith, 40, a minister at St. Stephen's Evangelical Anglican Church in Albuquerque, said a bill introduced into the Roundhouse last week that would make same-gender marriages illegal is "mean-spirited and based on fear. "It smacks of all the racial hatred generated in the 1960s. It comes from people living in fear of what would happen if people different from them got the same rights." Smith has run into discrimination before. A few years back, he was on the verge of becoming a Catholic priest when a bishop ordered him to receive counseling because of his homosexuality. SANTA FE NEW MEXICAN February 13, 1997 Johnson's mind is set: No married gays Gov. Gary Johnson doesn't want New Mexico's gay and lesbian couples to have the freedom to legally marry. Last week, Johnson said that while he hadn't really thought about it, he would be inclined to support a bill sponsored by Rep. Jerry Lee Alwin, R-Albuquerque, that would make same-sex marriages illegal. On Wednesday, Johnson spokesman Dan Hill made it clear that the governor has arrived at a definite position. "Call us old-fashioned, but we're against same-sex marriage," Hill said. Johnson also is opposed to a measure being pushed by gay rights activists - and sponsored by Rep. Patsy Trujillo, D-Santa Fe - that would make it illegal to discriminate against people on the basis of their sexual orientation. Johnson, raising an objection made in 1993 when a similar bill was being debated, said that because a person's sexual orientation is not a visible trait like race, Trujillo's bill would lead to false claims of sexual discrimination. "I don't know who's gay and who's not gay," Johnson said. Smith left the Catholic church and ended up with the Anglican church, which he described as a blend of both the Episcopal and the Catholic traditions. "It's strongly based in social justice and human rights. It's based on the fact that no one should be discriminated against and that religion shouldn't hurt anyone." The sponsor of the anti-gay marriage bill, Jerry Lee Alwin, R-Albuquerque, said in an interview earlier this week that "I don't care what any apostate church" says about same-sex marriage. "It's not in line with the holy word," said Alwin, a 54-year-old businessman. Smith disagreed, "Jesus actually said nothing about homosexuality." It's people's conjectures about what Jesus and the Bible say about homosexuality that has led to a bias against gays among far-right extremists," he said. Alwin said his bill is not targeting gays, but instead aims to protect the institution of marriage - which he defined as "a relationship between one man and one woman, period. "It's a special partnership. It's the basis of family values. It's meant for procreation, to have kids," Alwin said. Alwin is hardly alone in his views at the Roundhouse. Sen. Leonard Lee Rawson, R-Las Cruces, is an equally vociferous critic of same-sex marriages. Moreover, more than 30 additional legislators signed Alwin's bill. "I could have had a lot more. Everybody wanted to sign it," Alwin said. So far, no legislator has spoken out against Alwin's bill, which has yet to have a committee hearing. Gov. Gary Johnson has endorsed it. The bill defines a heterosexual union as the only legally valid form of marriage. It also says that if a couple of the same sex marry legally in one state and then move to New Mexico, the state will not recognize the union as valid. It also would impose a fine of at least $50 on anyone possessing the authority to marry who marries a gay couple. The Rev. Pat Langlois, senior pastor of Emmanuel Metropolitan Community Church in Albuquerque, said that since there is nothing in the bill that would prohibit it from applying to clergy, this provision crosses the line between church and state and is therefore unconstitutional. Langlois, one of the main organizers of today's event, said she conducted 15 marriage ceremonies between same-sex couples last year. The ceremonies were largely symbolic, however, because New Mexico law does not recognize gay marriages. The ceremony slated for today - during which participants will receive certificates of marriage and commitment - also will lack legal weight. At least eight clergy members are expected to preside over the ceremony. They include Christians, a Rabbi, a Navajo woman and a minister with the Wiccan church. According to the Rev. Dian Firebearer Mueller, the religion practiced in the Wiccan church is not witchcraft, as is commonly thought, but is instead a revival of indigenous, pre-Christian, earth-honoring religions. Mueller said her church takes the position that marriage is a rite of commitment and love that transcends gender, creed and race. The ceremony has raised the ire of conservative Christian groups, including the New Mexico Christian Coalition and Concerned Women of New Mexico. "Homosexual marriage makes a mockery of the whole institution of marriage," Tony Olmi, chairman of the coalition, said earlier this week. Langlois, a Christian, said Christian fundamentalists do not speak for the majority of Christians. "I for one am tired of having my religion being stolen by a small group of people," she said.Langlois' denomination has been performing "holy union" ceremonies for same-sex couples since its founding in 1968. Langlois, a lesbian, married her female partner two years ago. Langlois, 34, is hoping to become pregnant later this year from sperm donated by a friend. One reason gay rights activists want same-sex marriages legalized is so that they can receive the same financial benefits and tax breaks as heterosexual married couples. But Langlois said this is about a lot more than a tax break. SANTA FE NEW MEXICAN February 14, 1997 'Love knows no ... gender At Capitol, 31 gay couples celebrate their committment, but Albuquerque lawmaker shuns activist By KEITH EASTHOUSE It had been a long time coming. One was a University Hospital case manager. The other was a research scientist for Lovelace Hospital. Together, they were a duet, partners in life, testimony to 11 years in a monogamous relationship. To the case manager, Joan Robbins, 49, of Albuquerque, it seemed rather unremarkable that she would want to marry her soul mate, the person she met at a spirituality group in Los Angeles more than a decade ago. And it would have been unremarkable had her partner not been Denise Wheeler, 46, another woman. Robbins and Wheeler joined more than two dozen gay and lesbian couples at the east entrance of the Capitol late Thursday morning to marry in a joint ceremony under a light snowfall. Although the marriage will not be legally recognized, most couples saw it as an important stand anyway. "I think it's a great opportunity to make a statement that we want to be given the same respect as other monogamous couples," Robbins said. "We want our relationship to be honored the same way." Other stories such as this were recounted on the Capitol steps. Couples who had fallen in love, some through letters, some at first glance. Dennis Enyart-Tucker, 49, pinned a red carnation on the tuxedo lapel of his husband, Charles. "How did we meet?" he asked. "How did we meet," he said, turning to Charles. It was in Thoreau, N.M., two years ago that they both attended a gay male retreat. They sat up one night at a dining room table for five hours simply talking. "We've been together since," Charles Enyart-Tucker said. Both extended their hands to display custom-made wedding rings designed with three overlapping triangles carved into the gold, with a pink triangle-shaped stone set slightly left of center."We wanted to make a public commitment to each other," Dennis Enyart-Tucker said. "We can't understand, in our eyes, why that is so threatening to other people." Beth Saltzman, 34, and Patti Levey, 37, stood hand in hand in matching dainty satin Jessica McClintock wedding dresses. They first wore the dresses at a wedding ceremony two years ago in San Francisco, the same city where they met while country western dancing. "We were in the same community of friends," said Saltzman, a St. Vincent medical librarian. "Good relationships develop over time." Saltzman and Levey first ignited the debate over same-sex marriages when they asked for a marriage license at the Santa Fe County clerk's office last week. The couple was denied an application after the clerk said she would have to consult the Attorney General's Office on the legality of the request. Rep. Jerry Lee Alwin, R-Albuquerque, has also introduced a bill that would make same-sex marriages illegal. "The state has no right," Saltzman said. "If they would just open the state constitution, it plainly says that they cannot discriminate on the basis of sex. Equal protection under the law." As she spoke, a female passer-by tapped her on the shoulder. "You're really lovely," she told Saltzman and Levey. "Just lovely."Barbara Shapiro, 50, and Faith Bowle, 53, of Santa Fe made their first commitment to each other 2´ years ago in a Buddhist wedding ceremony at their home. The couple, who met at the Women's Wednesday Night Group in Santa Fe, felt it important to recommit their love for one another. "We have just as much right to be married and do it publicly," Shapiro said. "The fact that we're willing to be married," Bowle added, "is a tradition that we want honored." Two women faced each other and wept openly during the ceremony. They would love to be as open with their story, they said. The couple met 7years ago at a women's music festival in Michigan. They corresponded between Atlanta and Canada and got to know one another, slowly. The woman from Canada moved to the United States only to have her citizenship denied because her partner is a woman and federally, same-sex marriages are not recognized. Because she is considered illegal, she cannot use her master's degree in public administration. Instead, she works as a maid in Albuquerque. The couple fears deportation if they speak publicly. Though their marriage vows were bittersweet, they wiped tears from each other's faces and smiled. "How do you talk about 10 years together?," the Atlanta native said. "We've been through very good times and we've been through so many hard times," she said, squeezing her partner's hand. "This is my soul mate. We're in it for the long haul." Four of the organizers of the event - in which 31 homosexual couples exchanged vows - happen to be constituents of Rep. Jerry Lee Alwin, the Albuquerque Republican sponsoring a bill that would make same-gender marriages illegal. So after it was all over, the four activists - accompanied by members of the news media - went down to Alwin's office to discuss the bill. It was an unexpected visit as no appointment had been made. It was also, evidently, unappreciated. The activists - who included two gay clergy members, the Rev. Pat Langlois and the Rev. Rusty Smith - were kept waiting outside Alwin's closed office door for about 15 minutes. Then suddenly a contingent of about a half-dozen police officers arrived on the scene. They questioned the activists briefly and then most of the officers left. Soon Alwin appeared, and, accompanied by an officer or two, walked right past the activists as television cameras rolled. He stopped briefly in a small conference room for a quick, behind-closed-doors interview with two reporters. He called the gay marriage ceremony "fradulent," complained that in coming to his office the activists were being "overly aggressive" and said he would talk to them if they made an appointment. "They didn't use proper etiquette," Alwin said. He said he had not called the police. Gilbert Baca, the House sergeant-at-arms, said the police had come in response to a call from the office of Rep. J. "Andy" Kissner, R-Las Cruces. Kissner and Alwin share the same office. Alwin, still with his state police escort, then walked upstairs to a committee room. The activists followed. One of them - Robert Summersgill of the New Mexican Lesbian and Gay Political Alliance - repeatedly shouted: "Mr. Alwin, why won't you speak to your constituents?" The episode ended when the activists finally accepted the fact that Alwin wasn't going to talk. They vowed to make an appointment to see him soon, but they were clearly upset. "I feel really sick," Smith said. "He shouldn't be treating any New Mexican with the disrespect with which he just treated me." The day began with the mass marriage ceremony outside the Capitol before a crowd of about 300. As a light snow fell, 10 religious leaders - including Christian ministers, a rabbi and a Navajo woman - took turns speaking about the beauty of two people being in love no matter what their sex. "Love knows no race, age, creed or gender," the Rev. Dian Firebearer Mueller said. Lisa Charley, a Navajo spiritual leader, offered a prayer "for those that don't have love in their hearts" - a clear reference to Alwin, Sen. Leonard Lee Rawson, R-Las Cruces, and others opponents of gay marriages. Langlois said that because most churches ostracize the union of same-sex couples, this marital commitment "serves as a prophetic defiance as well as a public affirmation." The 31 couples were then told to face one another and place one hand on top of the other in a sign representing infinity. "A relationship has no beginning and no end," Langlois said. They were asked a series of questions about their faith and love to one another. After each one, they answered: "I will." The couples then embraced, and there were plenty of teary eyes to be seen. "That felt so good," said Carie Winslow, a 39-year-old woman from Albuquerque who had just exchanged vows with her partner of nine years, Weed Roy. James Thornton, 43, of Santa Fe said it might be hard for heterosexuals to understand the significance of gay couples being able to demonstrate their love for one another publicly. "You often walk around feeling you have to hide the central fact of your life and then all of a sudden you can do it," Thornton said. Added his partner of four years, 40-year-old Martin Goodman: "I felt amazingly moved." The only negative note was a red sign held by a man standing off to the side. "We love you, not your behavior," the sign said. And on the other side: "Sin kills." The large crowd then moved out of the chilly weather and into the Capitol rotunda. About 30 members of the Gay Men's Chorus, clad in white, sang Ave Maria and the Star Spangled Banner. Then, during a 30-minute news conference, gay rights activists attacked Alwin's bill and expressed support for a bill sponsored by Rep. Patsy Trujillo, D-Santa Fe, that would make it illegal to discriminate against anyone on the basis of sexual orientation. "You don't have to stand next to us on the bus but you do have to let us on the bus," declared Linda Siegle, a lobbyist with the Coalition for Gay and Lesbian Rights. The atmosphere was jubilant - despite the fact that Alwin's bill has considerable support. More than 30 lawmakers signed the legislation, which defines a heterosexual union as the only legally valid form of marriage. If that was on anyone's mind as the gathering broke up, it wasn't evident. "I'm so proud of us!" one woman shouted. SANTA FE NEW MEXICAN, February 15, 1997 Straight couples renew vows, too by KEITH EASTHOUSE Demonstration at Roundhouse includes expressions of love along with revulsion over gay marriages Twelve heterosexual couples - including an Albuquerque lawmaker who is pushing a bill that would make gay marriages illegal - renewed their wedding vows in a ceremony at the Roundhouse on Friday (Feb. 14). The gathering, which attracted a crowd of about 50 people, was not nearly as large or as cathartic as Thursday's emotional gay wedding ceremony. The event on Thursday, in which 31 homosexual couples exchanged vows, drew a crowd of about 300. Friday's demonstration, however, was not lacking in vehement rhetoric. "We won't tolerate it. It's an abomination on society," Rep. Jerry Lee Alwin told the crowd, referring to the same-gender marriages that he is trying to ban. "The apostate church is putting this forward. The devil's working hard," Alwin added to strong applause from the mostly Christian crowd. Bonnie Miller of the New Mexico chapter of Concerned Women of America, a Christian group, was no less strident when it was her turn at the microphone. "The purpose (of gay marriage) is to destroy the family. If they can do that, they can destroy a nation," Miller said. Miller's group, along with the New Mexico Christian Coalition, put on Friday's event. It was originally planned to draw lawmakers' attention to the need to strengthen marriage and make it tougher to get a divorce in New Mexico. But the gay marriage ceremony, which was meant as a counterpoint to Alwin's bill, gave Friday's event added significance. Gay-rights activists have repeatedly said that same-gender marriages present no threat to heterosexual marriages. "When was the last time a same-sex marriage threatened a man and a woman's marriage?" the Rev. Pat Langlois, senior pastor of Emmanuel Metropolitan Community Church in Albuquerque, asked recently.Such a question would have fallen on deaf ears Friday. Bob Butler, pastor of Sandia Baptist Church in Albuquerque, said that "a marriage of people between the same sex doesn't make sense." "If that's allowed, what's to prevent" other unnatural unions, Butler asked, such as between a parent and a child? Rep. Timothy Macko, R-Albuquerque, argued that legalizing same-sex marriages would "lead to a slippery slope" and promote "other forms of perversion" such as bestiality. While the rhetoric on Friday suggested otherwise, gay rights groups are not seeking to legalize gay marriage. However, a recent favorable court ruling in Hawaii regarding gay marriage has created concern that unless New Mexico's Legislature takes a position on the issue, it will get resolved by the courts. Sen. Leonard Lee Rawson, R-Las Cruces, has said he is afraid that the courts "will rule liberally and accept gay marriages."