Concerned about your relationship?
  • Are you afraid of your partner?
  • Does your partner try to control what you do and who you see?
  • Has your partner ever threatened to harm you or your family?
  • Has your partner ever hit you or thrown things at you?
  • Have you ever been forced to have sex, or unprotected sex?
  • Does your partner threaten to "out" you or have you deported?
If you answered "yes" - even once - your partner may be abusive.

What you can do:
  • Talk with somebody you trust - a friend, relative, someone from work, your house of worship, or a health care practitioner.

  • Remember everyone deserves to be treated with respect. Don't let your partner control or mistreat you. Help is available.

  • At some time you may find yourself in trouble, so be prepared and put together an "emergency kit" of things you would really need if you had to leave suddenly.

Sample emergency kit:

Money - store some cash in a secret place where you can easily get to it. Be sure to include some coins for phone calls.

Keys - an extra set if keys should be kept in a safe place (at a friend's or neighbor's) in case you need to leave quickly.

Important papers for you and your children - birth certificates, passports, health insurance documents, photo ID/driver's license, immunization records, checkbook, medication, food stamps, social security cards, etc. (or copies of them) should be kept in a safe place.

Basic items - keep a small bag with your medicines, copies of your legal papers, an extra pair of glasses, and a set of clothes.


For help:
  • If it's an emergency, call 911 for assistance.
  • If it's not an emergency, you still have the right to file a police report. Call your local police department to have a police officer sent out to you or go into any police station to make a report.
  • Contact your local Anti-Violence Project or the GLBT Hate Crime Hotline: 
  • National Domestic Violence Hotline: 
    • voice: 800.799.SAFE
    • TTY: 800.787.3224

Click here for more on Domestic Violence in Gay Relationships

LAMBDA GLBT Community Services offers services for survivors of same-sex domestic violence. We have trained volunteers to provide support, help you figure out your options, and give you the resources and referrals you need. All of our services are free and completely confidential.