Subject: Action Alert!
From: [email-masked]
Date: Fri, 12 Jul 1996 13:45:53 -0400

Parents, Families and Friends of Lesbians and Gays (PFLAG)

July 12, 1996

                        ACTION ALERT -- KILL DOMA

Yesterday, PFLAG President Mitzi Henderson testified before the Senate
Judiciary Committee against the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA) which would,
for the first time, define marriage at the federal level.  This new
definition would restrict marriage to include only heterosexual couples.

At the hearing, ranking minority member Senator Kennedy (D-MA) did an
extraordinary job arguing against the bill.  He highlighted the divisive
nature of the bill and the need for basic civil rights protections for gay
and lesbian people.  While Senator Kennedy does not support DOMA, he will
lead efforts to attach the Employment Non-Discrimination Act (ENDA) as an
amendment to the bill.  ENDA is ground-breaking civil rights legislation
that would provide federal protection against job discrimination based on
sexual orientation.

Please thank Senator Kennedy and Senator Simon (D-IL) for their continued
support of the gay, lesbian and bisexual community and their leadership
role in advocating for tolerance.

Please also thank Senator Diane Feinstein for her insightful comments
during the hearing.  Although Senator Feinstein has not yet decided how she
will vote on DOMA she expressed great concern about the divisive nature of
the bill.  She also expressed support for attaching ENDA as an amendment.

Senator Edward Kennedy (D-MA): [email-masked]
Senator Paul Simon (D-IL): [email-masked]
Senator Diane Feinstein (D-CA): [email-masked]

Following is Mitzi Henderson's testimony.  Please distribute it widely and
join us in opposing this discriminatory piece of legislation.  For more
information, contact Zoe Hudson at [email-masked]

***********************************************************

Testimony Of

Mitzi Henderson
National President
Parents, Families and Friends of Lesbians and Gays
(PFLAG)

U.S. Senate Judiciary Committee
The Honorable Orrin Hatch, Chairman

"The Defense Of Marriage Act"
July 11, 1996

Thank you Mr. Chairman and members of the committee for the opportunity to
address you this morning about the "Defense of Marriage Act."  My name is
Mitzi Henderson and I am here as the President of the national family
organization Parents, Families and Friends of Lesbians and Gays.  We
profoundly oppose this legislation.

This bill is meanspirited: it targets a group of people for discrimination,
and sets up a debate that misrepresents a community already under attack.

This bill is unnecessary: it is an attempt at a solution to a problem that
does not exist.  My marriage does not need to be defended.  My husband and
I do not need your help to continue to cherish one another, and to respect
our vows of more than forty years.  What my family needs is a more tolerant
America.

We can recognize our differences about the right to marry for gay and
lesbian Americans and still oppose this legislation --  because we share a
commitment to tolerance.  We cannot now give up on a shared commitment to
improving the lives of Americans, and strengthening American families.

All across this country, Americans are on a journey.  Families, religious
communities, and leaders are ending our silence about homosexuality.  Many
people are misinformed, or uninformed about homosexuality.  And as a result
there is understandably a sense of unease, discomfort, and even fear.

I understand that confusion and fear.  Before my son came out to me 18
years ago, I had no information to help me to think positively about his
future life as a gay man.  I struggled as a parent, and as a religious
woman.

But I never gave up on my faith, and I never gave up on my family.  Today I
am an Elder in the Presbyterian Church, the proud mother of four and
grandmother of seven.

As a mother and grandmother, I appreciate honest attempts to strengthen the
American family, but lets not cheapen those concerns by pretending that
this bill helps families.

In fact, with this legislation, you will add another challenge to my job as
a parent.  I am forced to worry about my gay son in a way that I do not
worry about my other children.

Allow me to illustrate.

Almost two years ago our son, Jamie, fell ill and lost consciousness.  His
partner rushed him to the hospital -- but there was a problem.  Although
they have been a couple for nine years, Ray was unable to give permission
for treatment.  By federal and state law they are no more than strangers to
each other.

In health care every moment counts.  If Ray was legally married to my son,
time would not have been lost.  Time in which my son's condition worsened.

Health care concerns are one reason why I am in favor of same-gender
marriage.  But I am not asking you to take up that question.

In my lifetime we may never agree on how we understand God's love or human
nature.  I hope that right now, we can agree that at a minimum, we need to
practice tolerance for all of our families.  To do any less is to sanction
a hate that erodes the very family values you seek to protect.

I fear for Jamie -- not because of who he is, but because I know the price
of that intolerance.  In 1994 more than 4,000 people were physically
assaulted in nine cities because they are gay or lesbian.  I live with that
fear.  In all but nine states, my son can be fired from his job simply
because he is gay.  I live with that fear.

I wish I could have taken you with me for the last eighteen years as I've
grown and learned.  I wish you could see how my family is stronger for our
journey.  We can give more to our church, to each other, and to our country
than we ever thought possible because we dared to grow.

I would not let stereotypes destroy my family.  And I will not let
stereotypes continue to threaten my son's life.

You who know and work with gay and lesbian persons also know that the
stereotypes are false.  Most of you know that gay and lesbian people are
your constituents, your staffers, your family and your friends.

It is this community -- your colleagues, families, and friends -- whose
lives you are now considering.

The voters look to you in Congress to resolve serious problems with the
budget, health care, welfare and the important issues that only you can
deal with.

We come to you today with a simple message: do not engage in politics that
divide the American family.  You can not defend marriage by attacking our
sons and daughters.

Thank you.