[glstn.training.outline] Provided by: GLSTN 122 West 26th Street, Suite 1100 New York, NY 10001 USA Tel: (212) 727-0135 Email: glstn@glstn.org Web: http://www.glstn.org/freedom/ ANTI-HOMOPHOBIA TRAINING OUTLINE FOR SCHOOL STAFFS The attached outline is the basic approach used by the Gay, Lesbian, and Straight Teachers Network (GLSTN) in trainings which have already been held for nearly 400 school staffs around the country. This training has been highly successful and led to GLSTN being selected to develop the faculty training program of the Massachusetts Department of Education's "Safe Schools for Gay and Lesbian Students" program--the first state-wide effort aimed at ending homophobia in schools. Drawing heavily from individual testimony, it uses personal stories to give a human face to the problems gay and lesbian youth face in schools. This outline is designed to be user-friendly, with attachments providing substantial supporting materials and information on how to find resources. Ideally timed for two hours, the outline can be shortened by limiting the number of film excerpts and student testimonies used. We encourage you to supplement these sections by having panels of gay youth speaking whenever possible. We welcome your feedback. May this staff training outline be helpful to you in your work. Sincerely, Kevin Jennings Executive Director GLSTN ********** ** GOALS OF WORKSHOP ** 1. To provide basic awareness of prejudice against sexual minorities; 2. To provide basic information on sexual orientation; 3. To explain stresses on gay/lesbian/bisexual youth and how this impairs educational performance; 4. To explain how prejudice against sexual minorities impairs educational performance of all students; and 5. To equip teachers with some tools and skills to use to reduce prejudice against sexual minority youth and to create an inclusive classroom & school environment. ** BASIC PREMISES OF WORKSHOP ** 1. Personal feelings of staff towards gay/lesbian students are irrelevant. Staff are paid to serve all students, and it is inappropriate to allow prejudice to serve as an excuse for not meeting the needs of students against whom staff is prejudiced. 2. Prejudice against gay & lesbian people impairs the educational climate for all students and must be reduced if students are to learn effectively. ** WORKSHOP OUTLINE ** 1. OPENING. Distribute ATTACHMENT #1: HETEROSEXUALITY QUESTIONNAIRE to all participants. Allow five minutes for completion. Do not allow any questions or collaborative work on the questionnaire. After completion, ask participants to summarize their reaction in a one-word adjective at the bottom of the page. Then ask straight-identified members of the group to share their adjectives: list all on the board. Follow up on specific adjectives.Ask them to specify which questions provoked the most thought or strongest reactions.Introduce following vocabulary: homophobia; heterosexism; unearned privilege (i.e. privileges you get because you are born into a certain group, both because you "earned them"). Help participants see connections between vocabulary and questionnaire, emphasizing heterosexual privilege but citing examples of male privilege (no fear of sexual assault) and white privilege (no fear of negative reaction based on race) as well. Close by asking them to think as if they are gay or lesbian, and what new adjectives might appear on the list. Emphasize that it is hard for any student to learn when having those feelings. 2. DESCRIBE GOALS AND PREMISES OF WORKSHOP. (See the listing of goals and premises above.) Distribute the "Riddle Scale" (ATTACHMENT #2) emphasizing that all teachers need to be at the level of SUPPORT for all of their students. You can emphasize here that we may disagree with students' religious beliefs but that this does not make hostile treatment acceptable or tolerable: just because some Christians believe Jews are going to hell doesn't mean Jewish students should be tormented or denied equal opportunity. 3. PROVIDE BASIC INFORMATION ON SEXUAL ORIENTATION. A. Introduce vocabulary: sexual orientation; sexual behavior; sexual identity. Explain how sexuality is a combination of these three factors.(ATTACHMENT #3) It can be useful to use the "left-handed analogy" here. Explain that people who have a left-handed orientation were once victims of "leftophobia" (persecution in Middle Ages, the words "sinister" and "gauche" were used to denote negative things--both words with roots in left-handedness), that we once went to great lengths to try to change their behavior (tying kids' hands behind their back in school, for instance), but that this only led people to hide their left-handed identities and engage in occasional right-handed behavior which never changed their orientation. Although no longer "leftophobic," we are still "rightocentric" in this culture: demonstrate by asking participants who are left-handed to brainstorm number of ways in which right-handed people are favored in society. Then return this to sexuality structure. For more information on "left-handed analogy," see Blumenfeld & Raymond, LOOKING AT GAY & LESBIAN LIFE, also reprinted in Jennings, BECOMING VISIBLE. See also ATTACHMENT #4, from Chandler Burr's keynote at 1994 GLSTN Mid-Atlantic Conference: a 16-point description of a human trait that participants will probably guess is sexual orientation but is actually handedness (the similarity is quite strong in the description). An alternative way of introducing the analogy is to distribute ATTACHMENT #4, ask for questions, and not reveal what it is about unless someone guesses. ATTACHMENT #4 can also be used in B(iii). below. B. If necessary, take on "Why are people gay?" questions. Potential answers include: i.WHY DO WE CARE? We don't seem to care why people are straight. ii. WHAT IF PEOPLE DO CHOOSE TO BE GAY? Is this a proper basis for denial of equal access? (Use analogy of religion here: Jews choose to be Jewish, so does that mean anti-Semitism is okay?) iii. INTRODUCE SCIENTIFIC DATA. Best evidence are twins studies that show tendency of gays who are twins to both be gay. Read "Homosexuality and Biology" by Chandler Burr in April 1993 ATLANTIC MONTHLY for more info (look for forthcoming book by same author). Inform participants that homosexuality is no longer considered a disorder (APA, 1973), that no professional association (psychiatrist, psychologist, social workers, etc.) advocates or believes it is possible or prudent to seek to "change" sexual orientation. iv. ASK PARTICIPANTS IF THEY WOULD CHOOSE TO BE GAY AS A CHILD. Cite statistics on hate crimes (1987 U.S. Justice Dept. study citing gays as most frequent victims of hate crimes), harassment (NGLTF study showing 1 in 5 adolescent lesbians and 45% of adolescent gay boys suffering assault and harassment due to sexual orientation; Hunter study showing 41% of gay youth had experienced physical attack), verbal abuse (Mass. Gov. Commission studies showing prevalence of verbal homophobia, with 97% of students at Lincoln-Sudbury High School reporting verbal harassment is common); discrimination (only 9 states with civil rights laws); and general alienation of gays in society. (See Attachment 5 for sources of all statistics). 4.EXPLAIN STRESSES ON GAY/LESBIAN BISEXUAL YOUTH. A. LACK OF SUPPORT. Begin by asking participants to think of themselves at age 13 and where they would turn for support when confronted with a problem (13 being the median age at which one realizes one is gay). Then explain special isolation of gay/lesbian youth, as opposed to other youth, as they cannot generally access following sources of support: i. FAMILY. 26% of gay youth report having to leave home due to negative parental reactions to their sexual identity. ii. FRIENDS. Cite Lincoln-Sudbury survey, with 97% of students having heard homophobic epithets used at school. Cite Hunter study that 41% of gay youth have suffered physical violence. iii. SCHOOL. Cite lack of support services, role models, homophobia by teachers/staff. Cite Mass. Governor's Commission survey showing 53% of youth had heard teacher use homophobic epithets in school. Cite Sears Univ. of South Carolina study showing 80% of teacher hold anti-gay attitudes, with 1/3 classified as "high-grade homophobes." iv. RELIGIOUS COMMUNITIES. Surely you don't need us to give you examples, but be sure to emphasize that some denominations (Unitarians, Quakers, Reform Jews) are in fact pro-gay, so that you do not demonize people of faith. B. EXPLAIN HOW THESE STRESSES IMPAIR STUDENT PERFORMANCE. This is best illustrated through human stories. Do this by: i. ORAL READINGS OF WRITTEN TESTIMONIES. See ATTACHMENT #6 for testimonies: in this segment choose samples from #1-13. Ask for volunteers to read; distribute samples and ask listeners to make 2 lists: one on what the youth feel, and one on the behaviors they engage in as a result of these feelings. Follow up by listing the first list and then the second on two halves of the board. Use statistics (see D below) to show they are not isolated stories. Save the feelings list--do no erase as you will need it later. ii. FILM/VIDEO EXCERPTS. This does not preclude use of written testimonies and can often bring a "human face" to the issue as well as provide a welcome change-of-pace in presentation style. If dealing with a high school audience, show first half of GAY YOUTH by Pam Walton (available from Wolfe Video, P.O. Box 64, New Almaden, CA 95042, cost $60), which details the suicide of a teen named Bobby Griffith through his journal and testimony by his mother. This segment takes about 18 minutes. If dealing with an elementary-middle school audience, use BOTH OF MY MOMS' NAMES ARE JUDY, aimed at young children of gay and lesbian parents and their experiences (produced by and available from the Gay and Lesbian Parents Coalition Intl. (202) 583-8029. This is about 12 minutes long. iii. STUDENT PANELS. While often effective, it is important to: * make sure students are emotionally prepared to give personal testimony; * give them clear time limits and a sense of what topics to cover; * be sure to bring up important points students might have missed in focusing on their personal experiences in order to give context. C. CITING STATISTICS. This is best done as a follow-up to stories. Be sure to illustrate following issues: i. POOR SCHOOL PERFORMANCE. 40% of gay youth report schoolwork being negatively affected by conflicts around sexual orientation. ii. DROPPING OUT OF SCHOOL. 28% of gay youth drop out of school. iii. HOMELESSNESS/RUNAWAY. 42% of New York City street youths are lesbian, gay, or bisexual. iv. ALCOHOL/DRUG USE. 58% of gay male youth at some point have a substance abuse disorder; 18% of adult lesbians and 31% of adult gay men do. v. SUICIDE. U.S. Dept. of Health and Human Services found that 30% of all youth suicides (5,000 annually) are by lesbian/gay youth (extrapolates to one gay youth death every 5 hours and 45 minutes), with gay youth 2-3 times more likely to attempt suicide (500,000 attempts annually) than heterosexual youth.Latter rate confirmed by Pediatrics study. vi. INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL BEHAVIOR. a. COMPULSIVE HETEROSEXUAL BEHAVIOR, as students try to "go straight" or deflect suspicions of classmates. Discuss risk of pregnancy & STD. b. UNHEALTHY SAME-SEX BEHAVIOR. Explain self-hatred and how it inhibits respectful interaction with other gay youth. Cite promiscuity and public sex outlets because of inability to connect emotionally with same-sex partner. Both leading to: c. HIV INFECTION. Explain lack of self-esteem and link to unsafe sex. Cite high rates of HIV transmission among teens: Centers for Disease Control statistic that 19% of all men and 24% of all women with AIDS diagnosed in 20-29 age group, positing infection period during adolescent years due to incubation period. AIDS seventh leading cause of death for adolescents. 6. EXPLAIN STRESSES ON HETEROSEXUAL YOUTH. Utilize similar techniques to those above: use Readings 14-16 (ATTACHMENT #6); refer to film excerpts if used above; draw on testimony of panels of family members (if available). Emphasize: a. YOUTH WITH GAY/LESBIAN FAMILY MEMBERS. Address special needs of youth with lesbian/gay family members, who are often as "closeted" as their relatives for fear of adverse reactions. b. BURDEN OF HATRED ON FRIGHTENED YOUTH. Explain high incidence of hate crimes and teen participation in perpetration of those crimes. Cite violence/harassment statistics (see 3-B-iv above): emphasize that hatred, fear, and ignorance are bad for the bigot as well as the victim. c. GENDER ROLE EXPECTATIONS AND LIMITATION OF EDUCATIONAL OPPORTUNITY. Begin by asking participants to raise hands if they ever feel hostile and show this feeling; then ask them to raise hands if they ever feel sad and show this feeling. Discuss how their reactions are "inappropriate" (most will raise hands for both we hope)-- women are supposed to be nurturing and men dominant, according to our gender roles, but we don't show those feelings/develop that side because of labelling. Explain use of homophobic epithets to frighten youth who do not conform to gender role expectations. Explain how students avoid activities (arts for boys, athletics for girls, for instance) out of fear of such labelling. Explain how this limits educational development: use examples such as Mikhail Baryshnikov, who could have been frightened out of being a ballet dancer because of homophobia although he was straight, and explain the loss then entailed by society when students self-select themselves out of activities. 7. SHOW HOW SCHOOLS CAN HAVE A POSITIVE IMPACT. It is important for people to see examples of positive programs so that they will feel empowered and have concrete examples of how to go about changing the climate in their schools. To demonstrate this, use the following: A. High School audiences: i. USE TESTIMONIES. Readings #17-25 (Attachment #6) are testimonies by both gay and straight kids from the Concord-Carlisle H.S. "Spectrum" Gay-Straight Alliance: ask volunteers to read them, asking listeners to once again make notes on what kids feel and what the school provides that helps them feel better. List these on the board afterwards. Contrast them with the negative list generated during the stresses segment. ii. USE FILM EXCERPTS. The second half of Walton's GAY YOUTH begins with a sampling of success stories and then focuses on Gina Gutierrez, an "out" lesbian senior who receives the "Bobby Griffith Award" at her high school. The segment illustrates Gina's family and her "normality" as a teen confronting many of the same issues--peer pressure, coping with family dynamics, etc.--as do other teens. Segment is 20 minutes long. B. Elementary-Middle School audiences. Use "DON'T LOOK THE OTHER WAY," a video from the "RESPECT FOR ALL: PREVENTING HOMOPHOBIA AMONG SCHOOL-AGE CHILDREN" series, which demonstrates effective actions taken by elementary school teachers combatting homophobia (available in a 20 or 60 minute version from Women's Educational Media, (415) 641-4616: see also three other videos in this series, which are designed for use with elementary-middle school students). 8. QUESTION-AND-ANSWER PERIOD. 9. CLOSING. Distribute "What You Can Do" packet (ATTACHMENT #7). Emphasize responsibility to meet needs of all students, responsibility of all teachers to create a welcoming climate for all students. Ask each participant to think of a specific action they can take in the next few days to create that climate. --------------------------------------------------------------- ATTACHMENT #1: HETEROSEXUALITY QUESTIONNAIRE 1. What do you think caused your heterosexuality? 2. When and how did you first decide you were heterosexual? 3. Is it possible heterosexuality is a phase you will grow out of? 4. Is it possible you are heterosexual because you fear the same sex? 5.If you have never slept with someone of the same sex, how do you know you wouldn't prefer that? Is it possible you merely need a good gay experience? 6. To whom have you disclosed your heterosexuality? How did they react? 7. Why are heterosexuals so blatant, always making a spectacle of their heterosexuality? Why can't they just be who they are and not flaunt their sexuality by kissing in public, wearing wedding rings, etc.? 8. Most child molesters are heterosexual men. Do you consider it safe to expose your children to heterosexual males? Heterosexual male teachers particularly? 9. How can you have a truly satisfying relationship with someone of the opposite sex, given the obvious physical and emotional differences? 10. Heterosexual marriage has total societal support, yet over half of all heterosexuals who marry this year will divorce. Why are there so few successful heterosexual relationships? 11. Given the problems heterosexuals face, would you want your children to be heterosexual? Would you consider aversion therapy? --------------------------------------------------------------- ATTACHMENT #2: ATTITUDES TOWARD DIFFERENCE: THE RIDDLE SCALE* ATTITUDES characteristics: REPULSION people who are different are strange, sick, crazy, and aversive PITY people who are different are born that way and it is sad TOLERANCE being different is a phase most people grow out of ACCEPTANCE one needs to accommodate differences but people who are different are not of as much value as oneself SUPPORT one works to safeguard the right of those who are different ADMIRATION once acknowledges that being different takes strength APPRECIATION one values diversity and is willing to confront insensitive attitudes NURTURANCE one assumes diversity is indispensable to a healthy society * FROM ALONE NO MORE: DEVELOPING A SCHOOL SUPPORT SYSTEM FOR GAY, LESBIAN, AND BISEXUAL YOUTH, 1994 APPENDIX A; DEVELOPED BY DOROTHY RIDDLE, PH.D. --------------------------------------------------------------- ATTACHMENT # 3: UNDERSTANDING SEXUALITY It can be helpful to educate participants about the structure of sexuality in order to avoid confusion. Many think it is inappropriate for people to talk about their "sex lives" with students, which reveals their misunderstanding about the ways in which we already discuss sexuality in the school setting. Trainees should be educated about the three basic components of sexuality: 1. SEXUAL ORIENTATION. This describes the attraction that one feels toward either or both sexes.Individuals are homosexual, heterosexual, or bisexual in their attractions. Why people feel the attraction they feel is unclear. For workshop participants who persist in saying that people "choose" to be gay, a quick rejoinder is to ask when they "chose" to be straight. A University of South Carolina study (Prof. James Sears, GROWING UP GAY IN THE SOUTH, see ATTACHMENT #4) found that the median age at which youth recognize the nature of their orientation is 13. Based on Kinsey's statistics, ten percent of people are believed to have homosexual orientation (this judgments is based on both behavior as well as the fantasy life of people interviewed by the researchers). People may challenge this figure: sometimes it is best just to avoid the numbers game and focus on actual stories as this humanizes the issue in a way statistics do not. 2. SEXUAL BEHAVIOR. This describes the sexual activities in which individuals engage, i.e. their "sex lives." Sears found that just under fifteen was the median age for first sexual experience for students in his study. The Kinsey Report found that 28% of boys and 17% of girls have a same-sex experience during adolescence. Realistically, while sexual behavior can be modified for a short time under extreme duress (situational homosexuality in prisons, for example), eventually one's behavior will conform with one's orientation. 3. SEXUAL IDENTITY. This is how one is recognized by others. Heterosexuality is automatically assumed unless a person "comes out" as gay or bisexual. Heterosexual people regularly talk about their sexual identity, in both explicit (mentioning spouses) and implicit (wearing wedding rings) ways. Gay people are rarely free to do so without suffering significant negative reactions. Thus, a disjunction occurs for gay people, who possess one orientation and behavior pattern but are forced to "pass" as something they are not to avoid discrimination. This leads to the isolation that puts gay youth specially at risk. Participants must understand that IT IS THE DISSONANCE CREATED BETWEEN ORIENTATION, BEHAVIOR, AND IDENTITY THAT CREATES PROBLEMS FOR GAY YOUTH; the necessity of hiding creates the isolation that puts these youth at higher risk for suicide and other ills. This three part structure helps to clear up many questions individuals have about exactly what we are proposing for discussion with students. Teachers are reluctant (and should be!) to talk about their (or anyone's) sexual behavior with students, and thus may be initially resistant to addressing gay issues because gay is automatically equated with sexual behavior. This model helps them to understand how we already discuss sexual orientation and identity, and that we are simply trying to redress a double standard which currently exists. --------------------------------------------------------------- ATTACHMENT #4: 16 ASPECTS OF A COMMON HUMAN TRAIT 1. This trait is a "stable, behavioral polymorphism." 2. It is a bipolar trait with two basic orientations, with around 90% accounting for the majority population and around 10% for the minority orientation, although there is debate about these percentages. 3. There are a small number of people who are oriented both ways. 4. Evidence from art history suggests the incidence of the two different orientations has been constant for five millennia. 5. A person's orientation cannot be identified simply from looking at them: those with the minority orientation are just as diverse in appearance, race, religion, and all other characteristics as those with the majority orientation. 6. Since the trait is an invisible, internal attraction, the only way to identify orientations is by the behaviors that express them. But the trait itself is not a "behavior." 7. Neither orientation correlates with any disease or mental illness. Neither is pathological. 8. Neither orientation is chosen, and 9. Signs of the orientation are detectable very early in children, often by age two or three. 10. Although the behavior of either orientations an be changed through coercion and social pressure--in the past, those with the minority orientation were forced as children to behave as if they had the majority orientation--the internal orientation remains. 11. Adoption studies show that the orientation of adopted children is unrelated to the orientation of their parents, demonstrating that the trait is not socially rooted, and 12. Studies show that monozygotic twins (i.e. from the same egg) have a much higher-than-average chance of being concordant for the minority orientation--about 50%--than dizygotic twins (i.e. from different eggs), who are more concordant in turn than adopted siblings, indicating a genetic component. 13. At the same time, there is of course a 50% discordance among identical twins. 14. Familial studies show no direct parent-offspring connection, but the trait clearly runs in families. 15. The pattern in which it runs shows a genetic "maternal effect" with a higher incidence in male offspring. 16. The incidence of the minority behavior is 27% higher among males than among females. Copyright (C) Chandler Burr, 1994 --------------------------------------------------------------- ATTACHMENT #5: SOURCES OF CITED STATISTICS 3.B.iv. WHY WOULD YOU BE GAY? Hate Crimes: U.S. Department of Justice. THE RESPONSE OF THE CRIMINAL JUSTICE SYSTEMS TO BIAS CRIME: AN EXPLORATORY REVIEW. 1987. Violence: NATIONAL GAY AND LESBIAN TASK FORCE, NATIONAL ANTI-GAY/LESBIAN VICTIMIZATION. 1984; Hunter, Joyce. "VIOLENCE AGAINST LESBIAN AND GAY MALE YOUTHS," JOURNAL OF INTERPERSONAL VIOLENCE, 1990, pp. 295-300; Verbal Harassment: THE MASSACHUSETTS GOVERNOR'S COMMISSION ON GAY AND LESBIAN YOUTH.MAKING SCHOOLS SAFE FOR GAY AND LESBIAN YOUTH. (1993) p. 50. (Also reprinted in Remafedi, G. DEATH BY DENIAL. Boston: Alyson Publications, 1995. 4. STRESSES ON GAY YOUTH i. FAMILY. Remafedi, G. "ADOLESCENT HOMOSEXUALITY: ISSUES FOR PEDIATRICIANS," Clinical Pediatrics, 1985 pp. 481-485. ii. FRIENDS. See studies cited under violence and verbal harassment above. iii. SCHOOL STAFF. ANTI-GAY REMARKS: THE MASSACHUSETTS GOVERNOR'S COMMISSION ON GAY AND LESBIAN YOUTH. MAKING SCHOOLS SAFE FOR GAY AND LESBIAN YOUTH. (1993) p. 51. (Also reprinted in Remafedi, G.) DEATH BY DENIAL. Boston: Alyson Publications, 1995. ANTI-GAY ATTITUDES: Sears, James. "PERSONAL FEELINGS AND PROFESSIONAL ATTITUDES OF PROSPECTIVE TEACHERS TOWARD HOMOSEXUALITY AND HOMOSEXUAL STUDENTS: RESEARCH FINDINGS AND CURRICULUM RECOMMENDATIONS" paper presented at 1989 American Educational Research Association Conference, Eric Document #312222. 5. C. IMPACT OF STRESSES ON GAY YOUTH. i. POOR SCHOOL PERFORMANCE. Sears, James. GROWING UP GAY IN THE SOUTH. New York: Haworth Press, 1991. ii. DROP-OUTS. Gibson, Paul. GAY MALE AND LESBIAN YOUTH SUICIDE, in Report of the Secretary's Task Force on Youth Suicide. U.S. Dept. of Health and Human Services, 1989. (Also reprinted in Remafedi, G. DEATH BY DENIAL. Boston: Alyson Publications, 1995.) iii. HOMELESSNESS. Buce, J., and Obolensky, N. "RUNAWAY AND HOMELESS YOUTH," in Bradley, M.J., and Obolensky, N. , eds., PLANNING TO LIVE: EVALUATING AND TREATING SUICIDAL TEENS IN COMMUNITY SETTINGS. Tulsa: Univ. of Oklahoma Press, 1990. iv. ALCOHOL/DRUG ABUSE. 55% Youth Figure: Remafedi, G., "MALE HOMOSEXUALITY: THE ADOLESCENT'S PERSPECTIVE," Adolescent Health Program, Univ. of Minnesota, 1985, unpublished; Adult Figures: EMT Associates, "SAN FRANCISCO LESBIAN, GAY, AND BISEXUAL SUBSTANCE ABUSE NEEDS ASSESSMENT, EXECUTIVE SUMMARY" 1991, pp. 2-3. v. SUICIDE. HHS figures: Gibson, Paul. "GAY MALE AND LESBIAN YOUTH SUICIDE," in Report of the Secretary's Task Force on Youth Suicide. U.S. Dept. of Health and Human Services, 1989. (Also reprinted in Remafedi, G.) DEATH BY DENIAL. Boston: Alyson Publications, 1995. Pediatrics figure: Remafedi, G, et al "RISK FACTORS FOR ATTEMPTED SUICIDE IN GAY AND BISEXUAL YOUTH," in PEDIATRICS (1991) pp. 869-76. 6. INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL BEHAVIOR. c. HIV INFECTION. Statistics provided by National AIDS Clearinghouse, Centers for Disease Control, Atlanta, 1991. --------------------------------------------------------------- ATTACHMENT # 6: YOUTH TESTIMONIES The following readings give a "human face" to the issues we are discussing. They can be supplemented by films recommended in the outline. I would also suggest that each trainer begin to make his or her own file of appropriate writings, as ones from individuals with whom you are familiar will speak more powerfully to you and this will show in your delivery of them. Another technique, if you have such access, is to ask students from the school you will be visiting to write anonymously on the subject of homophobia before your arrival, forward them to you, and then use those voices anonymously rather than these. Testimony from students from the actual school will be most effective, although this can sometimes be difficult to procure. Three types of testimony are included and are for use at different junctures in the outline provided: #1-13 are by lesbigay youth who have had problems #14-16 are by straight youth addressing problems brought on by homophobia #17-24 are written by students at Concord-Carlisle High School, a public high school in Concord, Massachusetts, who belong to Spectrum, the school's Gay-Straight Alliance. They are focused on how the Gay-Straight Alliance has helped and contain students of all sexual orientations. INDIVIDUALS ARE ENCOURAGED TO SEND ANY TESTIMONIES THEY DEVELOP TO GLSTN SO WE CAN FURTHER DEVELOP THIS RESOURCE. 1. LEE, 17, LESBIAN "There is one difference that sets sexual minorities apart from other minorities--we can be invisible, and are assumed to be a part of the heterosexual majority until we declare otherwise. I tried that for a while, going so far as to use a guy to prove to myself that I could be straight if I tried hard enough. But instead of being accepted into the mainstream, I lost my self-respect. I felt completely isolated from my friends and family. It appeared that I was the only one who ever had these 'queer' feelings. I couldn't come out to anyone, because surely they wouldn't want to be friends with anyone as sick and deranged as I. This initiated a downward spiral of self-hatred and anger motivated by homophobia. I hated myself for seeming to be everyone's worst nightmare--a homosexual. I was angry because no matter what I did I couldn't change that. I was angry because it seemed that I could never be happy. I was angry because I felt I had no right to be angry. I created impassable walls, shutting out love as well as hate. I grew increasingly cynical, trying to stave off hurt, because I felt no one would try to see the person behind the sexual label. I virtually branded myself with the message, 'Stay back!'." 2. SHARON, 16, LESBIAN, ATTENDING BOARDING SCHOOL "I wish I could be more open with my parents, but having realized that my father might cause me physical harm, I realize that this is not an option. I live in utter dread that someone will let something slip, or that they'll see or find something that will tell them I'm a lesbian. Before they arrived for the weekend, I scoured my room, jamming the newspapers, the buttons, the pins, anything with the word "gay" on it in the bottom drawer under every item of summer clothing I could jam in there. When they arrived--early--they spent a moment or two in my room, unguarded. Luckily, they didn't find anything. Nor, luckily, did they find anything when my mother cleaned my desk out at home. But when I'm with people I'm not out to, I'm always on guard against what might slip out. It makes me very tense." 3. STUDENT, 17, LESBIAN "I'm 17 and I'm gay. Adolescence is hell for me. I am told that my sexuality is something to be ashamed of, something to hide, something evil. I have cowered in my closet in shame and fear. I found myself lying to my parents and friends, being constantly afraid of discovery, and censoring my words and actions with paranoid concentration. I remember hiding books from my parents because I was ashamed of them discovering about me. In short, I hated my sexuality and myself. My closet wasn't a refuge, it was a prison, and it was destroying me. By staying silent, I was confirming the emotions that were killing me inside. I am not just a statistic. I live in a Boston suburb in a white house with black shutters. I go to school every day, feeling that I can't be honest, that I have no right to be proud, that I am a second-class citizen. Just this past week, as I was walking down my street in my town where I have lived all of my life, a pick-up truck full of guys ran me off the road, screaming "You lesbian!" at me. Homophobia is everywhere, and bigotry is inexcusable. It's time to start showing you care." 4. TEACHER "At 3:40 today Tracy called me and told me she had slashed her wrists and taken two bottle of pills. Tracy is a brave young woman who has struggled to come to terms with her sexual orientation and has bravely taken the lead in raising awareness on our campus as one of the Heads of our Gay-Straight Alliance. She said to me on the phone, 'I always thought, when I reached the breaking point, that it would be some big thing that pushed me over the edge. But it's not.'Later at the hospital, while waiting for her father to arrive from out of town, she said to me, 'What do I say when he asks me why I did it?' Dad, I just don't fit in with the world?'. As Tracy convulsed in her hospital bed, her stomach torn to bits by the pills she had taken, I murmured "I know, I know" and in fact I do know because--yes, just like you Tracy--I took 140 aspirin one night in high school because I couldn't see a way out, I couldn't see a future, I couldn't see a way to go on. You see, when you're a gay teenager, you don't need some big thing to push you over the edge, as Tracy discovered...You get the message every day of your life, just like Tracy did, that you just don't fit in with the world. You get it driven through your skull. Sooner or later you get the message, you get the point. Tracy got the point at about 3:40 this afternoon. Wonderful, brave Tracy, whom everybody thinks has it so together with her student leadership position and her 1420 on her SAT's, yeah, Tracy got the point today." 5. STEPHANIE JOHNSON, 17, LESBIAN "Imagine that you are looking at the world through the bottom of a glass. The image you get is distorted, twisted, and sometimes frightening, and who you are and your life experiences color the way you see things. I look at my life in this way: each part of me is a tint that is put in front of the glass and shades everything around me. Imagine now that I am looking and there is a black tint to the glass. This color, this blackness, represents my race and my background.I come from Harlem, New York.I am a first-generation American, my family being from Jamaica and, without any exaggeration, we are poor. We are on welfare. There are eight of us who live in a two bedroom apartment with three beds to share. I am a part of the America most people don't want to see and never encounter unless it is through the media or while driving through my neighborhood, safely tucked away in their cars. Imagine how baffled I was when I set foot in Wallingford, CT, to attend Choate. Carefully manicured lawns and for the first time in my life I had my own room, my own bed, my own space. Imagine how angry I was last year when a carload of kids drove by and screamed, "Nigger, go back to Africa!" Sometimes, looking at the world through this glass, I lose faith in it and its people. How can some people have so much and others so little? How can some people be so ignorant and malicious? Can you see through the black-tinted glass I am looking through? Now imagine there is a pinkish tint to the glass. This pink stands for my sexual identity. I am a lesbian. To break it down even further for you, I love women, I don't hate men, I just love women. But getting to the point where I could say this was not easy. Before I came to terms with my homosexuality I had to get rid of my own internal homophobia and a lifetime of anti-homosexual programming. Growing up I had feelings for other women.I didn't know what they meant, but I knew it was something I was taught was not right, and I hated myself for it. I thought I was the most disgusting thing on the face of the earth, not worthy of being loved or of even existing.This winter I had a long talk with a good friend of mine. With her I started a process of questioning, reflecting, and eventually coming out to myself. And now here I am. What does all of this mean? Well, 4 years ago I would never have said any of this. Four years ago, I was ashamed of my background and terrified that someone might find out I was from Harlem. Four years ago I couldn't even accept that I was a lesbian. But I have changed and gained strength from the faculty members and friends I have met at Choate, and I feel you can learn something from my experience. Take risks. Be proud of who you are, every part of you. Dare to be different, dare to be who you are. And even though the glass that we all look through may be frightening, tinted, or for some even broken, it doesn't always have to be that way. 6. RANDY DRISKELL, 18, GAY "I was very different from other students and they picked up on it. Immediately the words "faggot" and "queer" were used to describe me. Freshman year of high school is hard enough, but with the big seniors pushing you around because the rumor is you're the faggot, it's ten times worse. I knew I was gay. But who could I talk to? I had been conditioned into believing that gay was wrong. How could I tell my Mom that what I was, was bad and wrong? I lost respect for myself and wanted to die. Sophomore year came. I wanted so much to tell someone that I was gay. I got more involved with the school. I joined the drama club and the choir. I began the very slow process of coming out to my friends. This made things worse. I was spit upon, pushed, and ridiculed. My school life was hell. I decided to leave school because I couldn't handle it. But I quickly found out that I needed a high school diploma. I decided to go back to high school. I respected myself now and wanted to have a normal high school senior year. When I went back, things were even worse. I can't tell you how many times the first week of school kids asked me "Are you gay?" I answered "yes" proudly. No one accepted me. Some kids were so afraid of my homosexuality that they would run away saying "I don't want to catch your disease." One day I was sitting with some friends at lunch when, all of a sudden, a container filled with catsup came flying across the room and hit me. I was pissed off. I wanted something to be done. There isn't any education in my school system about homosexuality. The administration allows kids to graduate so ignorant. We are forced to cope with the results on a daily basis." 7. STUDENT, 18, GAY "I remember back in high school, before I dropped out, feeling really out of place and alone. I never quite understood why I felt so different. I didn't withdraw from anything--in fact, I was kind of popular, playing on the soccer team and all. I had a girlfriend for three years but the whole time it was a lie. Everything I did was never true to me. It was what everybody said I was supposed to be doing or what I thought I was supposed to be doing. I had this friend Mike. He and I were best friends for the longest time and, as time went on, I realized I was in love with him. It felt so wrong, like there was something wrong with me, and I just couldn't handle it anymore. I had nowhere to go, no one to talk to. When I did confide in a school counsellor, she screwed my life up. She went back to my parents and told them all these things I had been saying. I never told her I was gay because to me being gay meant you put on lipstick and wore dresses because that's all you ever see on TV, and I never thought that was me. I got kicked out of my house in July. There was violence involved. My mother came at me with an iron and I called the police. The police came and my mother told them I was always in Boston with fags and that I'm doing this and doing that. The policeman started to crack all these fag jokes and telling me what he would do if his kids were gay and told me that I should just leave. I said, "Where am I supposed to go?". He said, "That's not my problem" and my mother took my keys and made me leave. I went to a friend's house. By that time I had come out to a lot of my friends. It was okay to have a gay friend but when it came time and I needed somebody's support, it wasn't okay to help me out. "What would people say about me?" these "friends" said. 8. ADELAIDE GOETZ, 16, LESBIAN "I think what has changed for me the most because of coming out has been school. It is not a place where I can feel comfortable being gay so therefore I cannot feel comfortable being myself. In the past year my life has become extremely unstable. My attendance at school has fallen steadily and school has become a place I no longer want to be. I'm scared of the confrontations I may run into because I'm about to start basketball season. Basketball has been the love of my life since I was a small child and I could never imagine not playing. But recently thoughts of not going out for the team have been very strong. I have spent the last two seasons ignoring homophobic comments made by the team, and I have even laughed along with them at times. Things are different now, because they know I'm gay. Will the comments and jokes end? Will I have to endure the pain of walking into a room that's noisy and having it suddenly fall silent upon my entrance? The school itself is accepting but students don't always give off that attitude. Thoughts of suicide and dropping out more than occasionally pass through my mind. The sad realization that, at age 16, I am a recovering alcoholic, does not add to this pretty picture." Note: Adelaide Goetz dropped out of high school later that year. 9. STUDENT, 17, LESBIAN A day in which the issue of sexual orientation is not mentioned or spoken about in school would be unusual. Every day I am forced to listen to the unaccepting or ignorant people around me. There seems to be no escape. Lately I've started to lose hope altogether. It feels like nothing I can do will make a difference. If I confront the homophobia around me, it takes up all my time and energy, and I feel totally alone in doing it. Furthermore, the students have no reason to listen to me. I am not a teacher, not an adult. I don't have power here. I think one of the reasons that the homophobic students are so comfortable with expressing their opinions is that many teachers are not aware of what is happening, and some of the ones that are aware are homophobic themselves and choose to do nothing to change the situation. I hear homophobic comments all the time in my classes. Sometimes I think teachers don't hear what goes on in their classrooms. Other times, though, I think they don't listen. Maybe they don't listen to the offensive comments because this issue isn't important to them.I think there is a difference when its people like you who are being constantly slandered, misunderstood, and hated. I want teachers to remember the I can't block out the homophobia. I hear it even when I don't want to listen. I hear it every day that I am in this school. And it hurts a lot. 10. STUDENT, 16, LESBIAN We live in a straight world and a straight school.That's not going to change, but I wish that gay, lesbian, and bisexual people could have the same advantages that straight people have. Many straights don't realize that you have advantages, but that is because those advantages are so basic, you take them for granted. An example of this that sticks out in my mind is the ease with which you can take a date to a dance. It's not that I would not be allowed to take another girl to a dance, but the decision would be incredibly problematic, and I'd have to think and worry about it a lot. I would have to try and plan for the possible reactions of the students (Will I get beaten up? Will I get taunted in public? Will my tires be slashed?) I'd also worry about the reaction of teachers who saw me there. How would I know that if a teacher sees me with another girl, they might not like me anymore? I would be nervous that some teachers would grade me differently. I don't know that they would, but I also don't know that they wouldn't, either. The point is, straight kids don't have to consider this, and I do. They can take whoever they want and not think twice. It's another question as to whether or not it's okay to slow dance with my date, and a further question of whether we could kiss. Each of these things straight kids take totally for granted. I wish I could, too. 11. STUDENT, 18, GAY I think it's fair to say I grew up without any real role models. There aren't Asian-Americans on TV--Connie Chung and a few Fu Manchu rip-offs don't really count. There are even fewer gays and lesbians. Experiencing life as a double minority has given me insight into how people focus on the parts of a person rather than on the whole. About a year and a half ago I came out. Being involved in a support group helped me overcome my confusion and helped me to become proud of my sexuality. But I began to distance myself from my cultural heritage. The Chinese family sees homosexuality as abnormal and immoral. This caused me to hate myself for being yellow. Reconciling and integrating my sexual identity and cultural backboard is a major obstacle for me. I am not "out" to my parents, who highly value Chinese traditions. This puts an incredibly barrier between us. I am afraid they will be deeply hurt and confused when I decide to share this part of my life with them. 12. STUDENT, 17, LESBIAN It is extremely difficult for me to feel safe and open about my lesbianism at this high school. I'm also incredibly tired of people assuming I'm straight. After school today, I was quite upset and a girl in one of my classes asked me if I was okay. When I told her that I was having relationship problems, she said, "Oh, you broke up with your boyfriend?" I said, "No, my girlfriend. "She kind of looked at me funny, and said, "Sorry" and walked away. Straight kids have all kinds of people they can talk to at the high school for advice and help in their personal lives. Mostly friends, but also teachers. Lesbians and gays don't. We can't go to teachers because you don't know how they're going to react. And we can't go to friends for the same reason. 13. STUDENT, 19, LESBIAN It was easy for me to be "out" because I had dropped out of high school. But for one person in my life it was different--my little brother. He still had to deal with high school peer pressure. When I came out to him he begged me to keep it from his friends. He said that if his friends ever found out they would leave him, even torment him, all because of me. I couldn't understand why he couldn't accept me for who I was and put me ahead of his friends. I didn't realize how bad it was, until recently. About 2 months ago my brother invited some of high school friends to sleep over. That night, I fell asleep watching TV in the living room, which is right next to my brother's room. Around 4 in the morning I woke up from the noise they were making. They were talking about a kid who had come out to one of his friends, and that friend had then told their entire school. One of my brother's friends said that, if any gay person came on to him, he would kill him. One of the other kids said that homosexuals were sick and that they should be put on an island and bombed. Then someone else said maybe they should "straighten this kid out"--meaning, beat him up. Everyone laughed. It was very frightening to hear all of this hatred and anger coming from young kids, who have probably never known another gay person in their lives. I snuck to my room and cried. I cried for myself. I cried for other gays and lesbian who have had to deal with situations like this. I cried for the young boy who had trusted a friend and been betrayed. But most of all, I cried for my brother. You see, through all of his, he kept quiet. He couldn't stand up for me because he was afraid. Afraid for himself. Afraid he would lose his friends. Afraid that their hatred and anger would be turned on him. For any student trying to get through high school, it is tough. But from someone like my brother, it is a cruel punishment. Right now he is just trying to survive, to graduate, without revealing his secret. 14. STUDENT, 16, STRAIGHT "Two years ago my parents got divorced and my other started to have a lesbian relationship. This scared and confused me, and she tried to talk to me about it, but I always pushed her away. As far as I was concerned, that topic was off-limits. I know I shouldn't push her away, but it's so hard for me to deal with. After your speech I called her to tell her about it and I felt like what I was really saying was "I realize and accept your relationship." It was likely I was finally admitting that my mother is a lesbian. I don't really know though, because I still haven't really talked to her about it. And I still don't think I can, that's the worst part. But I feel like that phone call was the first step. I feel like I'm carrying this big burden on my shoulders. I don't think any of my friends could understand or, worse still, they wouldn't want to get to know my mother, and she's such a great person. My best friend adores my Mom--in fact, she just invited Mom to her graduation. And I wonder, would she feel the same way if she knew about my Mom's relationship? I remember you saying, "Don't expect the worst in people, but it's hard--it's hard to know who to trust." 15. STUDENT, 17, STRAIGHT Four years ago, I learned that my mother is a lesbian. How is a girl who has just turned 13, supposed to react to that type of news. I felt life as I knew it was over. The woman who had borne me, nourished me, put clothes on my back and a roof over my head, was a stranger. Homosexuality isn't like divorce. When my parents were getting divorced, so were some of my friends' parents. TV discussed the effects of divorce on children. Family members asked me how I felt and gave me words of advice and shoulders to cry on. But the horizon was bleak for homosexuality. There were no friends going through the same trauma. Relatives didn't flock to my side. There were no TV specials telling them how to deal with it. Phil Donahue, where were you? Life as I knew it didn't really end, though--it just changed slightly. The gay women I have come to know through my mother weren't flannel-clad bikers but a diverse group which includes corporate managers, lawyers, therapists, teachers, and artists, some of whom are also mothers. These black women have class, intelligence, and confidence. I am lucky to have them as friends and role models. 16. STUDENT, 17, STRAIGHT Matthew and I were walking down the street on our way to the bank. We walked by a man who was sitting on the steps of his brownstone. As we approached he began yelling at us."Hey, gay boy! Can't you hear me fag? I'm talkin' to you!" What are you doin' with that girl? Stop killing us and stay with your own kind! We tried to ignore him. "Why don't you answer me? I'm sick of you fags takin' over? Don't you hear me?" I then realized that I could simply walk out of my house and be victimized by any bigot who chose to hurt me based on who my friends are, who I am, or who he thinks I might be. 17. STUDENT, 17, LESBIAN Without Spectrum, our school's Gay Straight Alliance I don't know where I would be. I used to convince myself that my suicidal tendencies, low self-esteem, patterns of self-mutilation and anorexia had nothing to do with my being a lesbian in an environment which I did not feel was supportive enough for my needs. Having had Spectrum in our school has empowered me. It has helped me to feel that I have more of a sense of gay community in my school, and support around me from both gays and straights, from both teachers and students. As Spectrum has done its work, and my environment has become more supportive, the problems in my life which I used to think were unrelated to my being a lesbian in a largely unsafe community have diminished. I cannot imagine what this school, and the students in it would be like if we did not have Spectrum. A GSA seems to me to be the first step--the most essential necessity--of my and other's survival. I had begun to take Spectrum for granted. I'm glad I was asked to write this. 18. STUDENT WHO CHOSE NOT TO IDENTIFY HIS/HER SEXUAL ORIENTATION Having the group Spectrum at our high school supplies a place for people to talk and share. We're thinking all the time. Our minds are coming up with revelations, questions, opinions, and we need to discuss them, or just tell them to others. When we do, our thoughts become collective and we have power--power to accomplish to express and to share our ideas, yet again, with those who don't seem to want to listen, or who just need some knowledge. And, of course, our group is a security blanket. It feels good and safe to have support and understanding. In general, groups like this are beneficial for all people, no matter what the issue. And because the safety of gays and lesbians in our school is being challenged right now, Spectrum is especially helpful. 19. STUDENT, 17, LESBIAN Through all the bad things that have happened to me, and the rough times I've had to endure at school as I've questioned whether or not I'm a lesbian, there have been a few prominent people and places that helped me along and gave me happiness. Spectrum, our school's gay-straight alliance is the first. Throughout the school year, I have looked forward to Spectrum because it is a place where people don't look at me funny for who I am, and a place where I know there are people who are allies and who support me. The second is the only out teacher in my school.He has been a friend and role model for myself through the times which I was most confused. One day, a day when I was particularly confused and feeling helpless, I went to this teacher and asked him a question about something I had read about gay youth. Because I was so distraught, I began to cry. The teacher, unaware of my confusion, took time out of his class to help me. From that time on, he has been there to talk about whatever I am feeling about myself, of even everyday random things. With Spectrum and this teacher, my life, which is normally fairly stressful, has been a little happier and easier to deal with. 20. STUDENT, 16, STRAIGHT I think that gay-straight alliances benefit the entire school by providing an opportunity for everyone to ask questions they may have, to discuss a topic that may be bothering them, and to rally the help of others to change problems and spread awareness to those who do not attend the GSA meetings. Alliances like Spectrum can focus on international issues dealing with homosexuality or bisexuality, and bring them to a local level. They can provide a supportive environment to students who cannot find support anywhere else. But gay-straight alliances benefit straight students as well as homosexual or bisexual students. No one benefits from ignorance, and everyone needs to be aware of people's differences because, whether they like it or not, they will all be affected by them. 21. STUDENT, 16, STRAIGHT Spectrum has made me aware of what my gay, lesbian, and bisexual peers go through on a daily basis. It has deepened my concern for all minorities as well. Above all, Spectrum has given me the confidence to stand strongly for what I believe in. I have noticed a better change in myself as a person since I became a member. 22. STUDENT, 16, STRAIGHT Before coming to this school, I was very much in the dark about homosexuality and gay issues. Although I supported the idea of gay rights, I had very little idea of what the term, or the issue was really about. I thought of all homosexuals as people straight out of "LA CAGE AUX FOLLES." Coming here to Spectrum has made all the difference in the world to me. For the first time, I became aware of the stereotypes and assumptions I was inadvertently making. I have learned so much about homosexuality this year through the Spectrum discussions! The group has also indirectly helped me and others to overcome such limited views by doing things such as increasing the volume of gay literature in the library and making homosexuality a "visible" issue in the school. I appreciate everything that Spectrum has done. It has made a huge difference in the way that I view homosexuality, bisexuality and being straight. 23. STUDENT, 17, GAY I love having Spectrum in our school. It, in a very fun and supportive way, opens the hearts and minds of those who come and want that to happen. Spectrum has opened me up to myself and allowed me to see and know a part of myself that I've questioned for a long time. Coming to Spectrum has broadened my views, not only of others, but of myself. It is nice to know myself better. Without Spectrum, I fear I still would be unhappy, in the dark, and in the closet. 24. STUDENT, 17, BISEXUAL Being a bisexual woman in a school is often a difficult experience. Until recently, I didn't realize how many wonderful and supportive people I have around me. Every day I look forward to going to my history class specifically, because my teacher has made it clear the his classroom is a place that is safe for everyone, including people of all sexual orientations. He works really hard to incorporate information regarding gay rights and history along with the rest of the curriculum. Another thing that makes my school a happier and more comfortable place for me is Spectrum, my school's gay-straight alliance. It meets once a week, under the supervision of an openly gay teacher. Since last year, I feel like we have accomplished so many things! Sometimes I get frustrated with the realization of how much work we still have to do, but then I stop to think of how incredibly far we've already come. --------------------------------------------------------------- ATTACHMENT #7: WHAT YOU CAN DO: IDEAS AND RESOURCES FOR EDUCATORS DEALING WITH GAY AND LESBIAN ISSUES Provided by: GLSTN 122 West 26th Street, Suite 1100 New York, NY 10001 USA Tel: (212) 727-0135 Email: glstn@glstn.org Web: http://www.glstn.org/freedom/ TEN ACTION POINTS The suggestions below are not all-inclusive, but are intended as starting points as you begin to think about how to end homophobia in your school. 1. GUARANTEE EQUALITY Gay and lesbian members of the school community need to know that their schools value equality and that they are protected against discrimination. Schools should add "sexual orientation" to their non-discrimination statements in all school publications as a way to communicate their commitment to equal treatment for all. 2. CREATE A SAFE ENVIRONMENT Every member of the community has a right to play his or her role without fear of harassment by peers: it is the school's obligation to take pro-active measures to ensure this right. However, in too many schools, physical and verbal harassment against gay and lesbian people is the norm. Schools must make it clear that neither physical violence nor harassing language like "faggot" and "dyke" will be tolerated. Clear harassment policies, which include sexual orientation as a protected category, must be developed and then publicized to the entire school community, so that the consequences of and procedures for dealing with such behavior are clear to all. 3. PROVIDE ROLE MODELS Studies consistently show that personal acquaintance with gay and lesbian people is the most effective way of reducing homophobic bigotry. Both gay and straight students benefit from having role models such as openly gay teachers coaches and administrators: straight students are offered an alternative to the inaccurate stereotypes with which they have been raised, and gay students get the chance (often for the first time) to see healthy gay adults, which gives them hope for their own future. Schools need to create the conditions necessary for gay faculty to feel safe in "coming out," just as heterosexual faculty "come out" daily through such acts as wearing wedding rings. If no role models are available from within the school community, the school must work to bring in such individuals from beyond the campus. Inviting presenters from a local gay and lesbian speakers bureau, gay youth group, or college gay and lesbian student association can help fill the gap left by the absence of openly gay faculty. These measures, however, cannot substitute for having on-campus role models, and should be seen as interim arrangements until these can be provided. 4. PROVIDE SUPPORT FOR STUDENTS Peer support and acceptance is the key to any student's feeling that he or she "belongs" in the school. "Gay-Straight Alliances" have been the key to creating such an atmosphere in many schools. These groups welcome membership from any student interested in understanding issues of homophobia and sexual identity, regardless of sexual orientation. They have been successfully established in all kinds of schools and in communities as diverse as Los Angeles, Chapel Hill, N.C., Lincoln, Nebraska, and Minneapolis. The diverse range of schools which now have "GSAs" indicates that, if there is a will, there is a way to establish one in any school. 5. PROVIDE TRAINING FOR FACULTY AND STAFF School staff need to be equipped to serve all the students with whom they work, including gay and lesbian ones. Understanding the needs of gay and lesbian youth, and developing the skills to meet those needs, should be an expected of all teachers. Schools must provide the ongoing training necessary for the faculty to fulfill this expectation. 6. REASSESS THE CURRICULUM Teachers need to incorporate gay and lesbian issues throughout the curriculum--not just in classes such as health education, but in traditional disciplines such as English, History, and Science. This can be done in three ways. First, incorporating new scholarship in fields such as gay history can now be done easily, due to the proliferation of such material in recent years. Second, teachers can address the impact of sexual identity on works by gay and lesbian people already included in our curriculum, such as the novels of Virginia Woolf, the music of Tchaikovsky, or the poetry of Walt Whitman. Finally, teachers can undo the "hidden heterosexism" of the curriculum, such as the exclusive use of opposite-sex couples in math word problems and foreign language exercises. The bulk of the school day is spent in class; as long as gay and lesbian issues are seen as "special" and outside the classroom, students will continue to see gay and lesbian people as marginal. 7. PROVIDE APPROPRIATE HEALTH CARE AND EDUCATION While being gay is not a "health issue" (any more than being heterosexual is), health education on sexuality and sexually transmitted diseases should sensitively address the particular issues of gay and lesbian people in this field. Counselors and other health staff should be particularly careful to make their sensitivity to gay issues clear, as the history of psychiatric "cures" for homosexuality has led to a climate of distrust between many gay people and the health care profession. 8. DIVERSIFY LIBRARY AND MEDIA HOLDINGS Often, the library is the first place students turn for accurate sexuality information. Too often, few or no works on gay and lesbian issues are found there. Librarians and media specialists need to be sure their holdings are up to date and reflect the diversity of our world. The existence of collections addressing gay and lesbian issues needs to be communicated to the community, through events such as book displays which include gay and lesbian titles. 9. BROADEN ENTERTAINMENT PROGRAMS "Extracurricular" activities often set the tone for the community. Programs such as assemblies and "film nights" should regularly include gay and lesbian content that reflects the diversity of our nation. 10. DO NOT ASSUME HETEROSEXUALITY The constant assumption of heterosexuality renders gay and lesbian people, youth in particular, invisible. Such invisibility is devastating to the individual's sense of self. Both the school as an institution and its professionals as individuals must be inclusive in their language and attitudes. Inviting "spouses" instead of "friends," offering health care only to heterosexual families, and encouraging students to find opposite sex dates, are all inappropriate manifestations of heterosexism. By reminding themselves that gay and lesbian people are found on every staff, in every classroom, and on every team (which they are), faculty can "unlearn" heterosexism and become more inclusive in both word and deed. RESOURCES FOR EDUCATORS DEALING WITH GAY AND LESBIAN ISSUES ORGANIZATIONS THE GAY, LESBIAN, AND STRAIGHT TEACHERS NETWORK (GLSTN). GLSTN is a national organization that brings together gay and straight teachers in order to combat homophobia in their schools as well as to support gay teachers. For information, contact: GLSTN 122 West 26th Street, Suite 1100 New York, NY 10001 USA Tel: (212) 727-0135 Email: glstn@glstn.org Web: http://www.glstn.org/freedom/. PARENTS AND FRIENDS OF LESBIANS AND GAYS (P-FLAG). P-FLAG offers support to family members of gay people. Its national office can refer you to local chapters: P.O. Box 27605, Washington, D.C. 20038 (202)-638-4200. The Gay and Lesbian Parents Coalition offers support for gay parents and also for children of gay parents, the latter through its sub-group Children of Lesbians and Gays are Everywhere (COLLAGE). They can be reached at Box 50360, Washington, DC 20091 (202-583-8029). THE HETRICK-MARTIN INSTITUTE, a New York-based social service agency, has long been the leader in providing services for gay youth. They also publish You are Not Alone: The National Lesbian, Gay, and Bisexual Youth Directory, which is available for a $5 fee. Address: 2 Astor Place, New York, NY 10003, (212) 674-2400. THE BRIDGES PROJECT of the American Friends Service Committee facilitates communication among gay youth service providers through its newsletter and other activities. Address: c/o AFSC, 1501 Cherry St., Philadelphia, PA 19102 215-241-7133. Two organizations operate national, toll-free hotlines for gay youth: The INDIANAPOLIS YOUTH GROUP operates The NATIONAL GAY/LESBIAN/BISEXUAL YOUTH HOTLINE, 7:00-11:45 p.m., EST at 1-800 347-TEEN. They also offer a pen pal service, for which an application can be obtained by writing : P.O. Box 20716, Indianapolis, IN 46220. The OUT YOUTH AUSTIN HELPLINE operates seven days a week, 5:30-9:30 P.M., CST, and can be reached at 1-800-96-YOUTH (Address: 2330 Guadalupe St., Austin, TX 78705). PUBLICATIONS GENERAL BACKGROUND LOOKING AT GAY AND LESBIAN LIFE by Warren Blumenfeld and Diane Raymond is a good general introduction; IS IT A CHOICE?: ANSWERS TO THREE HUNDRED OF THE MOST FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS ABOUT GAY MEN AND LESBIANS by Eric Marcus is a good starting point as well; THE NEW LOVING SOMEONE GAY by Don Clark offers answers and information from a therapist for gay people and their families. SCHOOLS THE EDUCATION COMMITTEE REPORT OF THE MASSACHUSETTS GOVERNOR'S COMMISSION ON GAY AND LESBIAN YOUTH, MAKING SCHOOLS SAFE FOR GAY AND LESBIAN YOUTH, surveys the needs of gay youth and presents detailed recommendations for action by schools to meet those needs. Its recommendations were adopted as state educational policy by the Massachusetts Board of Education in May 1993. Write the Commission at State House Room 111, Boston, MA 02133, to receive a copy. Specifically focusing on independent schools: BREAKING THE SILENCE: ADDRESSING GAY ISSUES IN INDEPENDENT SCHOOLS, available from Bob Riddle of the Crossroads School (310-829-7391); Voices of teachers are found in ONE TEACHER IN TEN: GAY AND LESBIAN EDUCATORS TELL THEIR STORIES, edited by Kevin Jennings, a collection of autobiographical writings by 36 openly gay and lesbian teachers; SCHOOL'S OUT: THE IMPACT OF GAY AND LESBIAN ISSUES ON AMERICA'S SCHOOLS by Dan Woog is an collection of "snapshots" of what is happening in schools around the country; THE GAY, LESBIAN, AND BISEXUAL STUDENTS' GUIDE TO COLLEGES, UNIVERSITIES, AND GRADUATE SCHOOLS by Jan-Mitchell Sherrill is a wealth of information on post-secondary education. YOUNG CHILDREN The "ALYSON WONDERLAND" series, including such books as HEATHER HAS TWO MOMMIES by Leslea Newman and UNCLE WHAT-IS-IT? IS COMING TO VISIT by Michael Wilhoite, consists of books which introduce children to gay people in age-appropriate ways. A catalogue is available from Alyson Publications, 40 Plympton St., Boston, MA 02118. MIDDLE SCHOOL STUDENTS The Chelsea House "LIVES OF NOTABLE GAY MEN AND LESBIANS" biography series is excellent; AM I BLUE?: COMING OUT FROM SILENCE, ed. by Marian Bauer, an anthology of pieces by well-known children's writers, is also excellent; Good novels include: ANNIE ON MY MIND by Nancy Garden; THE DROWNING OF STEPHAN JONES by Bette Green. ADOLESCENTS A useful book for gay adolescents (or closeted people of any age) is OUTING YOURSELF: HOW TO COME OUT AS LESBIAN OR GAY TO YOUR FAMILY, YOUR FRIENDS, AND YOUR COWORKERS by Michelangelo Signorile, which is exactly what it says it is -- a step-by-step guide to coming out. Works addressing the experiences of gay youth include: GROWING UP GAY, GROWING UP LESBIAN:A LITERARY ANTHOLOGY edited by Bennett Singer, which includes a detailed resource guide to all national support groups in its appendix; TWO TEENAGERS IN TWENTY: WRITINGS BY GAY AND LESBIAN YOUTH, ed. by Ann Heron; NOT THE ONLY ONE: LESBIAN AND GAY FICTION FOR TEENS by Tony Grima; DEATH BY DENIAL:STUDIES OF GAY AND LESBIAN YOUTH SUICIDE by Gary Remafedi collects research on this subject (including the Mass. Governor's Commission report, see above); HELPING GAY AND LESBIAN YOUTH: NEW POLICIES, NEW PROGRAMS, NEW PRACTICES ed. by Teresa DeCrescenzo and THE GAY TEEN ed. by Gerald Unks (originally published as an issue of "The High School Journal") contain many useful articles. FAMILY ISSUES COMING OUT TO PARENTS: A TWO WAY SURVIVAL GUIDE FOR LESBIANS AND GAY MEN AND THEIR PARENTS by Mary Borhek provides practical advice to both gay youth and their parents from the mother of a gay son; BEYOND ACCEPTANCE: PARENTS OF LESBIANS AND GAYS TALK ABOUT THEIR EXPERIENCES by Carolyn Griffin; STRAIGHT PARENTS, GAY CHILDREN: KEEPING FAMILIES TOGETHER by Robert Bernstein; THE FAMILY HEART: A MEMOIR OF WHEN OUR SON CAME OUT by Robb Forman Dew; PRAYERS FOR BOBBY: A MOTHER COMES TO TERMS WITH THE SUICIDE OF HER GAY SON by Leroy Aarons; NOW THAT YOU KNOW: WHAT EVERY PARENT SHOULD KNOW ABOUT HOMOSEXUALITY by Betty Fairchild and Nancy Hayward; THERE'S SOMETHING I'VE BEEN MEANING TO TELL YOU by Loralee MacPike addresses coming out by parents; THE OTHER SIDE OF THE CLOSET: THE COMING OUT CRISIS FOR STRAIGHT SPOUSES AND FAMILIES by Anne Pierce Buxton tells an important side of the story; THE LESBIAN AND GAY PARENTING HANDBOOK by April Merten offers practical information for gay parents and is useful reading for those who will be working with these families; A MEMBER OF THE FAMILY: GAY MEN WRITE ABOUT THEIR FAMILIES, ed. by John Preston, DIFFERENT DAUGHTERS: SONS AND DAUGHTERS OF LESBIANS TALK ABOUT THEIR LIVES by Louise Rafkin; ALL THE WAYS HOME: PARENTING AND CHILDREN IN LESBIAN AND GAY COMMUNITIES, A Collection of Short Fiction edited by Cindy Rizzo et al, present important perspectives on gay and lesbian families. LITERATURE AND HISTORY Useful literary anthologies include: THE PENGUIN BOOK OF LESBIAN SHORT STORIES, ed. by Margaret Reynolds; THE FABER BOOK OF GAY SHORT FICTION, ed. by Edmund White; THE PENGUIN BOOK OF GAY SHORT STORIES, ed. by David Leavitt and Mark Mitchell; GAY AND LESBIAN POETRY IN OUR TIME, ed. by Carl Morse and Joan Larkin; THE PENGUIN BOOK OF HOMOSEXUAL VERSE, ed. by Stephen Coote; THE PENGUIN BOOK OF INTERNATIONAL GAY WRITING, ed. by Mark Mitchell. History books include: OUT OF THE PAST: GAY AND LESBIAN HISTORY FROM 1867 TO THE PRESENT by Neil Miller, a readable secondary source survey; BECOMING VISIBLE: A READER IN GAY AND LESBIAN HISTORY FOR HIGH SCHOOL AND COLLEGE STUDENTS by Kevin Jennings, a documentary collection and curriculum for high school history classes; MAKING HISTORY: THE STRUGGLE FOR GAY AND LESBIAN CIVIL RIGHTS, 1945-1990, An Oral History by Eric Marcus, a collection of readable interviews with many important figures in the gay rights movement; GAY AMERICAN HISTORY and THE LESBIAN/GAY ALMANAC, both ed. by Jonathan Ned Katz, which contain exhaustive collections of primary and secondary documents; SURPASSING THE LOVE OF MEN: ROMANTIC LOVE AND FRIENDSHIP BETWEEN WOMEN FROM THE RENAISSANCE TO THE PRESENT and ODD GIRLS AND TWILIGHT LOVERS: A HISTORY OF LESBIAN LIFE IN TWENTIETH CENTURY AMERICA, important works on the lesbian experience; STONEWALL by Martin Duberman, which details the events leading up the 1969 riots generally considered the beginning of the modern gay liberation movement. COLLECTIONS ADDRESSING DIVERSITY Numerous publications now address the diversity of the gay and lesbian community, including: TWICE BLESSED: ON BEING LESBIAN OR GAY AND JEWISH, by Christine Balka; IN THE LIFE: A BLACK GAY ANTHOLOGY, ed. by Joseph Beam; BROTHER TO BROTHER: NEW WRITINGS BY BLACK GAY MEN, ed. by Essex Hemphill; PIECE OF MY HEART: A LESBIAN OF COLOR ANTHOLOGY. ed. by Makeda Silvera; LIVING THE SPIRIT: A GAY AMERICAN INDIAN ed. by Will Roscoe; A LOTUS OF ANOTHER COLOR: AN UNFOLDING OF THE SOUTH ASIAN GAY AND LESBIAN EXPERIENCE, ed. by Rakesh Ratti; COMPANERAS: LATINA LESBIANS, by Juanita Ramos; AFREKETE: AN ANTHOLOGY OF BLACK LESBIAN WRITING ed. by Catherine McKinley et al; EYES OF DESIRE: A DEAF GAY AND LESBIAN READER ed. by Raymond Luczak. FILMS FRAMELINE, a San Francisco-based distributor, maintains a large catalog of gay films (415-703-8650) YOUTH FILMS INCLUDE: RESPECT FOR ALL: PREVENTING HOMOPHOBIA AMONG SCHOOL-AGE CHILDREN, a collection of four videos that look at how to educate K-6 students on gay and lesbian issues, available from Women's Educational Media (415-641-4616); BOTH OF MY MOMS' NAMES ARE JUDY, aimed at young children of gay and lesbian parents and their experiences (available from the Gay and Lesbian Parents Coalition 202-583-8029); Gay Youth (40 minutes) is an excellent documentary on the topic ($60, from Wolfe Video, P.O. Box 64, New Almaden, CA 95042); WHO'S AFRAID OF PROJECT 10? (23 minutes), a profile of one of the nation's first in-school gay youth groups (from Friends of Project 10, 7850 Melrose Ave., Los Angeles, CA 90046); THE DISCO YEARS (30 minutes), a gay teen story told in an "After School Special" style (Select Media 1-800-707-MEDIA); THE INCREDIBLY TRUE ADVENTURE OF TWO GIRLS IN LOVE, a feature depicting a coming-of-age romance between two young lesbians (not yet commercially available on video). DOCUMENTARIES INCLUDE: BEFORE STONEWALL (90 minutes), a history of the pre-Stonewall gay community; LAST CALL AT MAUD'S, which examines pre-liberation lesbian life by studying a well-known lesbian bar in San Francisco; COMING OUT UNDER FIRE: GAY MEN AND LESBIANS DURING WORLD WAR TWO (75 minutes), which shows how this event was a seminal moment in creating the modern gay community and movement; THE TIMES OF HARVEY MILK (90 minutes), the 1984 Academy Award winner profiling the life and assassination of the first gay man to be elected to public office in the U. S.; COMMON THREADS: STORIES FROM THE QUILT (85 minutes), the 1990 Academy Award winner which tells the human and political history of the AIDS epidemic through stories behind panels of the NAMES Project Quilt; VOICES FROM THE FRONT (90 minutes), which details the history of AIDS civil disobedience movement led by ACT-UP. FEATURES INCLUDE: THE WEDDING BANQUET, a comedy which tells the story of a gay Chinese man whose sexuality is revealed when he attempts a "green card" marriage; DESERT HEARTS, the love story of a woman who falls for another woman awaiting her divorce in Nevada; GO FISH, a portrait of life among some twenty-something lesbians; PARTING GLANCES, 24 hours in the life of a gay New York couple and their best friend, who has AIDS; MAURICE, the Merchant-Ivory film based on Forster's novel; TORCH SONG TRILOGY, based on Fierstein's Tony-winning play. ***** ***** ***** This document is part of THE GLSTN TOOLBOX, an online resource of practical information and tools, for educators, students, parents and community organizers, to help fight homophobia in K-12 schools. Founded in 1990 as a regional volunteer organization in Boston, The Gay, Lesbian, and Straight Teachers Network (GLSTN) today has over 20 chapters around the country and is the largest organization of teachers and community members dedicated to ensuring that all students are valued and respected, regardless of sexual orientation. GLSTN's work includes community organizing, providing programming to schools, and developing materials that teachers can use to raise awareness among their colleagues and students. Membership is open to all who are committed to ending homophobia in schools, regardless of sexual orientation or occupation. The GLSTN TOOLBOX is available from the Gay, Lesbian and Straight Teachers Network World Wide Web Site: http://www.glstn.org/freedom/ In the interest of sharing this information with others, you may copy and redistribute this document provided that all notices remain intact. You may not charge or make a profit from the redistribution of this material. If you have writing which you would like to contribute to The GLSTN TOOLBOX, please contact us by phone at (212) 727-0135 or by e-mail at glstn@glstn.org.