From: Mia H H Lam Subject: Remember the E-mail you sent to ABC News 4 years ago? (fwd) Date: Thu, 6 Apr 2000 09:03:27 -1000 ---------- Forwarded message ---------- From: Patricia Shields Subject: Remember the E-mail you sent to ABC News 4 years ago? (fwd) You might recall that about three years ago, ABC News presented an episode of their news magazine show, Turning Point, entitled, "Same Sex Marriage: For Better or Worse." You were so impressed with the show that you decided to write an E-mail to ABC thanking the producers and families involved. We are one of those families. Our names are Roslyn and Sheldon Merling and Andrew Merling and Doug Wythe. You may remember that our wedding ceremony took place in Montreal and that Sheldon went from early trepidation to embracing the event. After the show aired, the producers were kind enough to share the E-mail with us. We were overwhelmed by both the sheer number of responses and the depth of emotion expressed in them. Through reading these e-mails we realized our experience might be of help to other families with a gay or lesbian loved one, and that the best way we could share the story was in the form of a memoir. Next, we decided that the four of us should tell it together, each one writing from his or her own individual perspective. In writing the book, we discovered that at the core, what mattered most about our experience was not the act of simply getting married, but coming out before friends, family and community; each of us, parents, son and son-in-law, living our lives openly without shame or secrecy. And it's that aspect of our story which we hope will appeal universally to gays, lesbians and their heterosexual families, regardless of whether a wedding is in the offing for them or not. We are proud to say that after much hard work, the book will be released on March 7th, 2000. Below is a copy of the press release as well as our current book tour schedule. If you are in any of the cities where we will be doing book signings, we would be honored if you could join us. And if you can't attend, we hope you can take a look at the book next time you're in your local book store. (You can also find it at amazon.com and barnesandnoble.com.) William Morrow A Division of HarperCollinsPublishers 10 East 53rd Street, New York, NY 10022 CONTACT: Sharyn Rosenblum 212-207-7470 / sharyn.rosenblum@harpercollins.com THE WEDDING: A Family's Coming Out Story by Douglas Wythe, Andrew Merling, Roslyn Merling and Sheldon Merling Most families come to terms with a child's homosexuality in private. Lucky for us, this brave group has chosen to share its compelling and surprisingly intimate coming out journey in a very public way. Luckier still, they've crafted an inspiring page-turner that should give us all hope for the future. --Eric Marcus, author, "Is It A Choice?" and co-author of, "Breaking the Surface". This story is timely for now-and from now on. I love the Merling and Wythe-Merling families. What extraordinary, beautiful people. --Betty DeGeneres, author of, "Love, Ellen." .....taps into deep emotional reserves in its depiction of two men in love and the parents who, despite some initial misgivings, reach out to support them through a cultural landscape which denies the truth of their commitment...Honesty with very little sap, The Wedding offers a snapshot view of a family coming to terms with one another with courage and concern. --Kirkus Reviews On March 7, 2000, William Morrow will release THE WEDDING: A Family's Coming Out Story (William Morrow/An Imprint of Harper Collins Publishers, March 7, 2000; ISBN 0-380-97691; $23 Hardcover) by Andrew Merling, Douglas Wythe, Roslyn Merling and Sheldon Merling, a fascinating memoir of two men and the togetherness of a family. With the impending wedding as a catalyst, and Andrew and Doug's announcement of their desire to have a traditional religious ceremony, THE WEDDING takes the reader through a painful and joyful odyssey of discovery as the authors recount their struggle to be heard and to find acceptance from each other, their friends and their communities. Their four distinct voices blend to create a unique depiction, not just of two families becoming one, but of coming to grips with the reality of being a gay couple in today's world. The authors' struggle was profiled in a one hour episode of ABC News Turning Point, "Same-Sex Marriage: For Better Or Worse". The public outpouring of support and encouragement via letters and e-mail to ABC News was so empowering that they decided to write this book in hope of helping other families. THE WEDDING is the first book to speak to both sides of a controversy that is altering our society. The culture wars are heating back up and gay marriage is now at the top of the list of battles about to be fought. For instance, Vermont Supreme Court recently thrust the issue of gay marriage to the top of the country's agenda by ruling that gay couples deserve the same rights and benefits as heterosexual spouses. In contrast, on March 7th, 2000, Californians will be voting on an anti-gay marriage initiative proposed by Senator Pete Knight (R-Palmdale) which could potentially add a provision to the Family Code providing that only marriage between a man and a woman would be recognized, and considered valid in California. Known as the Knight initiative, this ballot measure has caused a family drama to be played out on a public stage following the public admission by Senator Knight's son, a decorated fighter pilot like his father, that he is gay and that Senator Knight's brother died of AIDS. The release of THE WEDDING is also timely in light of the gay and lesbian March on Washington to be held on April 30, 2000. ABOUT THE AUTHORS: DOUGLAS WYTHE is an Emmy-winning television producer and writer with his own production company. ANDREW MERLING holds a Ph.D. in Clinical Psychology, is on staff at St. Lukes-Roosevelt Hospital in New York City, and has a private practice. He resides with his partner, Douglas, in Manhattan. ROSLYN MERLING has a Masters degree in social work and runs psycho-educational groups for parents of gay men and lesbians. SHELDON MERLING is a real-estate attorney and resides with his wife, Roslyn, in Montreal, Quebec. THE WEDDING: A Family's Coming Out Story By Douglas Wythe, Andrew Merling, Sheldon Merling, and Roslyn Merling ISBN: 0-380-97691-9 Publication Date: March 7, 2000 $23.00 Hardcover E-mail us at wedding96@aol.com with any questions or comments. The following appearances have been scheduled thus far. PLEASE JOIN US!! Thursday, March 2, SAN FRANCISCO. A Different Light . 489 Castro Street. 7:30 P.M. Reading and Talk/Booksigning. Friday, March 3rd, LOS ANGELES. Weho Lounge in West Hollywood, 8861 Santa Monica Blvd. (1 blk east of San Vicente) 8:00 P.M. (310) 659-6180 Saturday, March 4th, LOS ANGELES. Barnes and Noble in Westside Pavillion, 10850 West Pico Blvd. 3:00 P.M. 310-475-4144 Friday, March 31st, MIAMI. Books & Books. 933 Lincoln Road. 7:00 P.M. Booksigning.\ Saturday, April 22nd, BURLINGTON, VT. Borders Book Store. 1:00 P.M. Booksigning. Saturday, April 22nd, MONTREAL. L'Androgyne. St. Laurent Blvd. 8:00 P.M. Booksigning and talk. Thursday, April 27th, NEW YORK. New York Advertising and Communications Network (NYACN). 1 Little West 12th Street. 8:00 P.M. Signing and talk. Saturday, April 29th, WASHINGTON, D.C. Crown Book Store at Dupont Circle. Call for time Thursday, June 1st, NEW YORK. Barnes and Noble, Lincoln Square. 7:00 P.M. Reading/talk/booksigning. Date and time still pending: Toronto, Canada: Weekend of March 17th.